Chosson and kalloh seeing each other on day of wedding

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07 Jan 2009 00:02 #808 by meirk
What's the custom of the chosson not seeing the kalloh on the day of wedding (before chupoh)? Can they talk on the phone? What's the ta'am for this minhog?

Toda

Meir

Meir Koschland

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08 Jan 2009 02:22 #812 by Michael
This custom of limiting the meetings of the Chosson and Kalloh at the day of the wedding and before, is a very recent custom, and was not accepted in Ashkenaz at all. Actually - Chuppas Mein was done in the morning, in which the Chosson and Kalloh meet, and only later during the day the wedding was made.

FRBSH

In Israel, the general public does not meet a week or even two weeks before the wedding, and some are against phoning too. I don't know how this became so widespread.

Michael

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08 Jan 2009 16:51 #813 by meirk
Toda!

Not meeting for one week, is a chassidic custom.

Meir

Meir Koschland

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08 Jan 2009 16:56 - 06 Jul 2012 16:33 #814 by Michael
But in Israel - almost everyone does not meet for two(!) weeks, as I mentioned, not only the chassidim. It is interesting to know how this minhag became so widespread. The Chshash lichorah is of Dam Chimud, but that has nothing to do with meeting, as mentioned in the Gemoro (נדה סו עמוד א).
The Chassidim in Israel do not meet the Kalloh at all between their engagement and the wedding.

Michael

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09 Jan 2009 12:54 #817 by Daniel
The Mishnah Berura mentions the seudas savlonus in hilchos tisha b'av. This meal is eaten the night before the wedding. So the Chofetz Chaim apparently did not know of not seeing each other before the wedding!

Daniel

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